Challenges

Yesterday I paid to get the carpets cleaned.

Actually, I got a REALLY good deal.  And while I was kind've hoping that we would be over all this pee and poop business with Megan, our voucher was expiring so it needed to get done.  So I contained the girls while the carpets were cleaned and then rushed them out of the house at 10:30 a.m. and kept them out running errands until 4:30 p.m. to give the carpets a chance to dry.  No nap for Abby.  No nap for me.  90 degree weather.  BIG pregnant belly.  And a 4 year old and a 2 year old.  

Yes, it was an exhausting day.  

And the first thing that Megan did when we got home?  Pee on the carpet.

I kind've lost it.  Ok I really lost it.  Not to Megan's detriment (except that she was extremely upset that I made her wear a pull-up and took all her underwear away), just crying and upset (this is me again) and what am I going to do about this girl lost it.  My goals for my children have really been modified these past few months.  Right now I would like them to be potty-trained so that they can leave the house and I can have a clean one.

Then today I took Megan to see a pediatric gastroenterologist.  Because I am at the end of my rope.  So we're going to spend the next 2 days trying to clean out her system (because it seriously needs it) but the doctor also ordered blood work to test for diseases and disorders -- primarily thyroid diseases and Celiac's disease.  Because she agrees with me that it sounds like something more than just bowel.  And that nearly made me fall out of my chair.  Maybe the results will come back negative, but I finally felt a little validated about all of this testing and evaluation that I've been doing.  FINALLY.

So we stopped at Target on the way home to get our supplies for O.D.W. (Operation Disgusting Weekend) and jelly beans because Megan was a super trooper for having her blood taken (side note, she's very concerned right now that she doesn't have enough blood in her body any more) and I'm walking into the store pregnant, carrying Abby (who was partially asleep) and holding hands with Megan and a guy passes us by and says to me "well you just really like a challenge don't you?"

Not usually the comment I get -- it usually is something about having my hands full or excitement / relief that I'm having a boy (apparently finally and this means that I'm done to now have boys and girls).  But it made me think.  How many times have I heard the phrase, or said myself in the past few months -- this is really really hard and THIS IS NOT WHAT I SIGNED UP FOR!  And it occurred to me just today, maybe I really did sign up for this.  Maybe before I came here I saw a little bit of what my life would be like and said yes, I can do this!  Or maybe I didn't know exactly what I was getting into but I knew better then that it would be ok and it would be worth it.  In other words, maybe I need to have more faith.  Because sometimes I just really want a single reference to potty-training in the scriptures.  Or handling tantrums or children talking back or fighting with each other or gee, what else has been happening lately??

I don't know if I'll have any great answers when this bloodwork comes back but I guess if I don't love a challenge, I better learn to!!